Men make better friends
This is an article I've been wanting to blog some time ago. But as I flicked through the pages of Janice Wong's book - SPG: Single Picky Girl, I spotted other just as interesting articles. So here, tada... Presenting the article which I used to agree.. But ever since 1 of my guy friends did sth & I was a wee disappointed, my opnions swayed..
Read the following article & see how you feel about it.
In the 1989 romance movie, When Harry Met Sally, Harry tried to convince Sally that men and women can never be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
Not only do I disagree, I think men often make better friends, be it among themselves or with women.
Sure, inter-gender friendships can be tinged with sexual tension but this does not diminish the validity of my belief. The tension, if at all, is just an additional dimension that can be managed through communication.
Good friends, whatever the gender, are hard to come by and should be valued.
I value my men friends because they are less prone to getting upset over petty matters. If they do get upset, this lasts a day and is gone by the next.
Tell a man he has put on weight recently and he would pat his potbelly with good humour. Try that on a woman and may God save you. She is likely to simmer and brood for days, and give you the cold shoulder for a while.
Men, at least those around me, are good makan-mates. They do not peck at their food like sparrows or agonise over the pimple-trigger effect of this and that.
They are also good for a more rational perspective on things.
Whenever I encounter problems at work, the first friends I think of calling are my male ones. They break down my problem systematically and offer solutions. My girlfriends just join me in the histrionics and pass me tissue paper.
My favourite quality in men: The ability to keep secrets.
While men enjoy the thrill of circulating juicy gossip as much as women do, most can be trusted to restrain themselves if you ask them to. So far, none of my men friends has let me down.
No matter how hard I try to impress upon some women friends about the need to maintain confidentiality regarding some matter, they still inadvertently blurt it out. Okay, okay -- if you want me to admit it -- I have sinned in this respect as well.
Observe male buddies hanging out. They are easy-going and incredibly open to newcomers, yet inclusive of everyone in the group.
Perhaps it is a characteristic forged during national service. As one male colleague puts it: It's hard not to bond when you are together in the trenches, firing live bullets.
Granted, some of the male bonding over beer, playing cards and pornography border on silliness and absurdity.
But the bonding in a women's conclave is more akin to an exercise in sado-masochism as they sit around subtly comparing one another's dressing or saying: Guess what so-and-so said about you? After she said it, I was like...
The biggest concern for me against getting involved with women is how cruel, contriving and competitive we can sometimes be when dealing with our own.
A stark example: In last season's reality TV show Survivor: the Amazon jungle.
In the mixed group, the men treated deaf and plain-looking participant Christy Smith fairly and embraced her.
But in the all-women group, she was ostracised. In particular, the young pretty participants bullied her until they needed her help. Where's the sisterhood?
My eyes welled up at the scene.
The only complication of inter-gender friendship is when a male friend's girlfriend becomes jealous of his female friends and he is forced to distance himself or maintain them on the sly.
I am not saying women make lousy friends. My best friend is a woman. The movie Thelma and Louise is a celebration of our kind of friendship -- deep, long and meaningful.
But, in general, I prefer hanging out with men. They have taught me a thing or two about friendship, and then some.
Read the following article & see how you feel about it.
In the 1989 romance movie, When Harry Met Sally, Harry tried to convince Sally that men and women can never be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
Not only do I disagree, I think men often make better friends, be it among themselves or with women.
Sure, inter-gender friendships can be tinged with sexual tension but this does not diminish the validity of my belief. The tension, if at all, is just an additional dimension that can be managed through communication.
Good friends, whatever the gender, are hard to come by and should be valued.
I value my men friends because they are less prone to getting upset over petty matters. If they do get upset, this lasts a day and is gone by the next.
Tell a man he has put on weight recently and he would pat his potbelly with good humour. Try that on a woman and may God save you. She is likely to simmer and brood for days, and give you the cold shoulder for a while.
Men, at least those around me, are good makan-mates. They do not peck at their food like sparrows or agonise over the pimple-trigger effect of this and that.
They are also good for a more rational perspective on things.
Whenever I encounter problems at work, the first friends I think of calling are my male ones. They break down my problem systematically and offer solutions. My girlfriends just join me in the histrionics and pass me tissue paper.
My favourite quality in men: The ability to keep secrets.
While men enjoy the thrill of circulating juicy gossip as much as women do, most can be trusted to restrain themselves if you ask them to. So far, none of my men friends has let me down.
No matter how hard I try to impress upon some women friends about the need to maintain confidentiality regarding some matter, they still inadvertently blurt it out. Okay, okay -- if you want me to admit it -- I have sinned in this respect as well.
Observe male buddies hanging out. They are easy-going and incredibly open to newcomers, yet inclusive of everyone in the group.
Perhaps it is a characteristic forged during national service. As one male colleague puts it: It's hard not to bond when you are together in the trenches, firing live bullets.
Granted, some of the male bonding over beer, playing cards and pornography border on silliness and absurdity.
But the bonding in a women's conclave is more akin to an exercise in sado-masochism as they sit around subtly comparing one another's dressing or saying: Guess what so-and-so said about you? After she said it, I was like...
The biggest concern for me against getting involved with women is how cruel, contriving and competitive we can sometimes be when dealing with our own.
A stark example: In last season's reality TV show Survivor: the Amazon jungle.
In the mixed group, the men treated deaf and plain-looking participant Christy Smith fairly and embraced her.
But in the all-women group, she was ostracised. In particular, the young pretty participants bullied her until they needed her help. Where's the sisterhood?
My eyes welled up at the scene.
The only complication of inter-gender friendship is when a male friend's girlfriend becomes jealous of his female friends and he is forced to distance himself or maintain them on the sly.
I am not saying women make lousy friends. My best friend is a woman. The movie Thelma and Louise is a celebration of our kind of friendship -- deep, long and meaningful.
But, in general, I prefer hanging out with men. They have taught me a thing or two about friendship, and then some.
Sep 3, 2003
Streats
I was quite upset over my guy friend's act. Bt my dearest sis, qiqi said, "谁不犯错？一个做过很多好事的人就因一次做错而被抹杀了吗？" And my dearest dear cooled me down too. Well, I really admired these 2 ladies. The way they deal with disagreements & quarrels makes me 佩服得五体投地！*winks*
Comments
the weekend is here again.. FINALLY!!!
<3 qi